Well here comes the hardest part for me. The book is set to be released in 2 more days and I now have to go to each of the parents of the boys I wrote the book about and present them with a copy, and hope that they will feel it did them justice. Questions and concerns just keep rattling me. I know all these parents well too, Steves mom is so sweet and kind hearted, and very sensitive. She will cry, a lot. Robbies Mom and Dad are a bit of a different story. His dad is a bit hardcore while his mom is a bit more reserved but a lot more judgemental. I get the feeling that both of them will look at me with a bit more respect, but still remain wary of my intentions. Then there is Bens mom. I think shes the hardest, she knew me as a little kid too, and a messed up one. She is going to be the hardcore honest one. If she thinks I had no right to say those things she will tell me. The same thing I love her for I fear from her. Its always been that way with Diane. I know its pointless to worry at this point but I dont want any of these parents to feel like 'who the hell is she to write about my child'. I guess I feel that way because all along I have put myself in their shoes and wondered if Id feel the same if someone wrote a book about my deceased child.
Ill just keep telling myself I did it out of love, because thats exactly why I did. I love those boys still to this day and no matter how happy I ever become in my lifetime I will still look forward to the day that I get to see them again. Its more then comforting to know with positivity that I will.
