Tuesday, December 27, 2005

Salt Water Taffy Last Forever

Apparently it also has lasting emotional effects. I was talking to my son on Xmas day and he made this comment.

"I dont really remember much about being little. All I remember was that time you caught me with the candy."

???

What candy? I asked.

"I dont know, salt candy? Thats all I remember. That and being scared for my life. You just knew I had it and I was sure I hadnt made any noise getting it"

Back goes my mental file log. Waaaay back to around 1994 where I remember a friend giving me a box of salt water taffy. I recall putting it in the fridge even though her first comment was about how that shit last forever and never rots or loses flavor.

I was sitting in my apartment sewing a button back on a pair of his pants when he came running in from outside. He was either 5 or 6 at the time. I didnt hear him get the candy from the fridge which is amazing because I have nearly sonic hearing abilities. What busted him out was the look on his face. When he was headed for the front door I glanced over at him and he had the look about him as if he was expecting something to split my head open and crawl out of my cranium. When I looked at him he stopped moving. Just stood there frozen like a deer in headlights. I looked down, he took a step. I looked back up he stopped again.

"Ok, what the hell do you have in your pockets?" Most 5 year olds dont even recognize pockets on their pants, yet this childs hands were in his pockets up to his elbows.

Suddenly he looked like a kid on his first rollar coaster ride heading down the first hill. Eyes huge n all. I could hear a faint strangling noise as if he was about to scream.

"Cough it up, put it on the table"

Onto the table was dumped at least half of the box of salt water taffy. (Damn big ass pockets on kids pants these days)

Snickering I remember telling him "Oh yea I would have never noticed 30 pieces missing"

I made him leave the candy and then about a half hour later I took the same candy out to him on the playground. I didnt mind him having it, it was the point of him thinking he could slip by me with something.

Until recently I thought I still had to hide the deviant parts of my personality from him. Now, for one, I think he reads my blog. And 2, I raised him I suppose, so he has to be mentally as tough as nails. Then of all things he brings me a movie last week and tells me to check it out. Its called 28 days later. About 30 minutes into it I decided that he is far more deviant then I. So who is learning from who these days?

7 comments:

NaReN said...

hey, thanks for the comment on my blog .. was a bit surprised considering it was barely a min after a published it, but thanks a lot anyway :)

Ĵōÿ said...

Lol
No problem NaReN! I was utilizing the next blog button in the name of killing time. Very glad I found it though because it was a beautiful post. I'd encourage anyone to read Narens 'dreams die hard' post.

Anonymous said...

Absolutly deplorable. I condemn thee to the Nth degree.

Anonymous said...

one hot guy canadian calendar coming up!

michaelnicholas said...

Hmm, I don't much care for taffy, but I'm amazed that you were able to remember ten years ago, to something like that. I really don't even recall what I was up to ten days ago, or ten months for that matter.

Guess I could check old weblog entries, but not back ten freaking years. You never cease to amaze me, marry me! I'll have your babies, if you'd like.

Ĵōÿ said...

Anonymous - You arent the first one to do so.

Bran - Hell yes, if they'd let me across the border Id come get it myself.

Are we going to get married in Canada? And you are definately going to have to have the babies if there are any!

Azathoth100 said...

Hah. Bet he can't eat taffy to this day! Sounds like a story he'll be telling his kids someday.."Don't ever take her candy, here's what she did to me!".

Whats this about my home country? Why are we all going to Canada?

Hey anonamous, I'll see you in the pit because I'm condeming you too. It'll be one big happy family! Don't worry, I'm sure they'l allow hypocrits too.