Monday, January 29, 2007

Omfg I Need a Monkey

LITTLE ROCK, Ark. - An escaped chimpanzee at the Little Rock Zoo raided a kitchen cupboard and did a little cleaning with a toilet brush before sedatives knocked her out on top of a refrigerator.
The 120-pound primate, Judy, escaped Tuesday into a service area when a zookeeper opened a door to her sleeping quarters, unaware the animal was still inside.
As keepers tried to woo Judy back into her cage, she rummaged through a refrigerator where chimp snacks are stored. She opened kitchen cupboards, pulled out juice and soft drinks, and took a swig from bottles she managed to open.
Keeper Ann Rademacher says Judy went into the bathroom, picked up a toilet brush and cleaned the toilet. Rademacher says the 37-year-old Judy was a house pet before the zoo acquired her in 1988, so she may have been familiar with housekeeping chores. Judy wrung out a sponge and scrubbed down the fridge.
It took a couple of tries, but the zoo sedated the chimp, who fell asleep on top of the refrigerator with half a loaf of cinnamon-raisin bread she had pulled out of the freezer.
The zoo veterinarian gave Judy a drug to bring her around. Rademacher says Judy was groggy but fine after the episode.
The zoo says there was no danger Judy would get out of the primate keepers service area and onto zoo grounds.

Wednesday, January 24, 2007

Needs and Fears

Interesting things I already knew about needs and fears. I used to be REALLY scared of people. I mean, I wasnt scared of them doing anything in particular to me. I wasnt scared of them trying to shank me in the face when I went outside, or trying to wrassle me to the ground or anything. I just got really nervous and would lock up or shut down when people I didnt know very well were around.

My approach to this problem was not unsual for me. I got mad. I got really pissed off that these people were in MY way, not I in theirs. So I boldly strode out to find them and dared them to make me fear them. Dared them to try to hurt me in some bullshit kind of way. And it did take time and I did go through a LOT of fear but I was angry that they could make me fear.

In the end I made a lot of good friends. One is still my best friend to this day. I have known her since I was 12. Most of you who have read my book would know her as Janet. Which was just about the time I started getting angry at people. I have no signs of agoraphobia that I had before. Oh every once in a while I still get nervous when I have to walk into a crowded place. I still dont really LOVE being immensely surrounded by people I dont know. But I dont believe that fear is entirely unnatural these days.

My mom used to take me to church with her when I was very little and we ALWAYS got there late. Which caused the entire church congregation to stop and stare at us. It was that little moment that brought all the fear back to me. And asking her to stop making me go to church was like asking the sky to stop being blue. So each time I had to deal with that I shrunk back into myself a little more at a time.

But in the end I found out that my need for some people in my life, Janet being one of them, was far more intense then my fear of them. I havent suffered any irrational fears about people in at least 15 years. They did take a while to get over. But I had the kind of friends that wouldnt leave you alone. Those were the exact kind of friends I needed. By the time I was 17 or so the intense shy girl had begun to disappear. Not only Janet but I didnt have one friend who would allow you to just sit there and be shy. Being shy around them cost you far more self security then just opening up and being yourself did. So my need for friends and companionship overrode those fears of people that I had in the beginning. And to this day I couldnt be more happy that I didnt waste more time being so alone.

This wont work for everyone. For some people they need to take the little steps. Jumping headlong into shit for some may cause them to backtrack and become more fearful if that can even be fathomed. But for those people maybe they cant quite handle a Janet yet, but they could handle a short conversation on the phone first. A quiet night at home conversing with a newfound friend. Little bit by little bit they will find that the need has overridden the fear. It may take years, but what else do you have but time?

Tuesday, January 02, 2007

Use of Force

Okay so on December 15th I had a rather bad experience. I apparently had an icky reaction to some medication mixed with Sparks. Sparks is not appearing to be such a good idea anymore. In my opinion, the powers that be meant for you to pass out when you drink. Getting drunk and being full of energy can lead to bad bad things.

Such as Tasers. Yes I was tasered. And not by a good friend goofing off and desiring me to smash them in the face. By the PO LEECE. Near as I can recall I was pulled over in Vinton. That is where things get hazy. Wait, I am not going to lie, most of the night was hazy. But in the spirit of good luck, this was one of those nights it failed me. I was NOT drunk. I was on meds that you are not supposed to drink on. Apparently I had the 'mother of all bad reactions'.

Near as I can remember this is what went down.

Cut Scene

Riding in unidentified friends van.

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Riding in unidentified friends car.

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Riding to unidentified friends house.

Cut Scene

Police flinging me from unidentified friends vehicle telling me I smelled like a brewery. (I had one Sparks around noon that day, this was around 11pm)

Cut Scene

Police asking me if I would take a BAC and making comments assuming I wouldnt.

Cut Scene

Naked wrasslin with jail deputies.

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Taser lines comin' right for me!

Cut Scene

Locked down naked in the Hannibal chair.

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Waking up 2 days later, naked and cold in a cell.

Sorry NAACP but this entire incident proves that you can recieve unneccesary use of force without being

A) Black
B) Male
C) Underprivledged

I was covered in bruises from head to toe, and now instead of being forced to check with my doctor about having a bad reaction to medications, I am going to have to undergo Pre-Trial drug testing. No biggy seeing as how I wont fail those, but the point should be obvious. No one is immune to the royal shit treatment where our government is concerned.

Monday, January 01, 2007

New Year 2007

Wish I could say it was happy but unfortunately there is always some miserable asshole waitin in the back ground to make sure no one can be happy.

I will wonder forever how people like that can exist.

I made no resolutions this year, I feel like I was doing amazingly well just keeping last years, my first ever resolution.

So in light of giving back the gift I was given for new years this year I just have one thing to say...


You are one miserable motherfucker. Fortunately, no matter how strong you thought you were, you weren't strong enough to bring me down to your hateful level of bitterness. Quit taking out your anger on me and direct it to where it belongs, or forever remain a pussy in the eyes of mankind.

When busted in the face for disrespecting me this guys reply was 'Im not a fighter'

Odd that, the only broken bones Ive ever had came from him. I guess 'Im not a fighter' only applies to men. If it had been a woman who busted his lip, they would have gotten a broken face.

Dick, play your games with someone else.