Saturday, July 09, 2005

They Misunderestimate Me! Part I




Ok I know this will offend some people but please try to understand that it is written with passion. Dont mistake my passion for patriotism either. Of course I like my country. And of course I realize how much better my life as a woman is because I was born here instead of a country where women are treated in a less savory manner then they are here. I am only further disgusted because as I heard of the terrorist attacks on London I was shaken, only to come home and see all but a defiant smirk on Bush's face standing behind Blair while he gave his speech from the G8's. He is smirking as if he is saying "I told you so" to the world, to Britain in particular. Yes I told you so! I told you it was a good idea to bomb Iraq. Because they... well they have bombs right? And because if we bomb Iraq it will prove to other countries that we will not tolerate terrorism. As I said, dont mistake my passion for ignorance. I want to show you ignorance.



Society at large used to condemn pirates. Because in essence when an entire country said "No, we will not sell you our shit, because we dont like you!"
Well, the pirates didnt comply. No, indeed, they outright laid low, waited for a passing ship carrying the goods they wanted to sell, and then they jacked it. Yep, piracy was basically a jacking. Like car jacking, except it wasnt cars they were stealing, it was horribly dangerous items such as pepper or nutmeg. Now why would they steal shit like that? Well, it was a business to them. They were responsible for providing their goods to countries who couldnt retrieve them so easily themselves.

Here ya go. Lets try this sentance on for size.

"Argh maties, I only want to get the nutmeg that is coming to me. Because Tortuga will pay me enough money for that nutmeg so that I may sit on my haunches for the rest of my life in Parrot Bay doing nothing but living a leisurely life. And if they wont give me the nutmeg, then Ill kill them and take it!"

Ok, please replace nutmeg with the word oil. And Tortuga with... well any Arabic country that contains large oil reserves, as well as replacing Parrot Bay with Texas/Washington D.C.. and finally you will fully understand the above picture.

Moving on.



Am I wrong or did we come to this country, the poor and weary, rape, steal then kill the natives so that we could be free of religious persecution? Ok perhaps everything I learned was just total bullshit. But Im tired of this fucking country voting for God and Money. God isnt running, and we are running out of money. We the people that is. The President impoverishes us while his pockets grow fat on the dead bodies of our armed services.

WAIT! Dont get me wrong here. I support our troops fully. As a matter of fact it was only months ago that I considered signing up for the navy. Because I believe in fighting and dying for a cause. My cause, the cause of freedom. I do believe that a miniscule part of this "war" is being fought in the name of freedom. Every man and woman fighting in Iraq is fighting for our freedom. Thats me, thats you, thats them. Bush isnt fighting for our freedom. I cant believe the American people, after watching a couple centuries of religious tirades kill our men and women, will still vote for someone just because he is waving the eternal God banner. Maybe there is an 11th commandment I missed. Perhaps it goes somewhat like this.

11. Thou shalt not covet thy neighbors oil. Unless your own oil only has 250 years worth on reserve and you are worried that your daddy might not approve of your reign unless you go steal some more.

Fuck that shit. And on my life if I hear about Jeb being urged to run for a term after his brother finishes destroying the country, I will go stark raving mad. Because of course we would want a man for President who now sits in a state that is still partially destroyed by LAST YEARS hurricanes to run this whole fucking scene. Sadly this reminds me of the state of the corporate world in this country. Every man and woman who works in this country can attest to ONE THING. The losers, the lackwits and the lazy get the biggest best and quickest promotions. The honest and loyal regularly get a good thorough fucking. Not the feel good kind either.

So while we sit and support this puppet in his oil endeavors I want to make one thing clear. We always want to sit and say, "Well, look how people came together during 9/11. Thats what this country is made of!!"

Thats the speech that Bush has relied on for years now. But let me make something clear. This is NOT an American only sentiment. Lets say I was traveling in a country I like less...Hmm...just for the sake of arguement lets call it Irate. Im walking through Irate one day, on vacation, minding my own business when I see some shit blow up. Pouring out of the blown up building I see women and children. Oh no, do I stop to consider... hmm... wait, this isnt MY COUNTRY..... I will let those infidels fend for themselves. No, human nature kicks in, and pushes me towards the flames to save OTHER HUMANS. I dont care what country they come from. I am human, when I see other humans in need, I TRY to help as best I can.

Moving on.

Now wait. I know all you right wing/Christian/Masochistic folks are going... "But we didnt want to vote for the lesser of two evils. We didnt want to vote another blowjob getting democrat into the office. So we chose Bush, because hes a good wholesome christian man who values his wife, and his country."

Shut the fuck up. Just because someone doesnt get caught at something doesnt mean they arent doing it. Clinton was a bit sloppy I agree. But if the worse thing he did was kill a couple people who got in his way, and recieve a blowjob from an intern while serving his term, then lie to his wife about it... all I can say is two things...'OMG HES A MAN' and "Dear Lord!! I see the word JOB in that phrase." Something I havent had since Mr. Bush was elected years ago. And besides that, need I start naming names of other very highly esteemed past presidents who had an affection for the ladies? Or even an affection for little boys? Hell, what about an affection for wearing womens clothing? I thought not!

To wrap up Part I of the "They Misunderestimate Me!" portfolio. I leave you with some Bush words of wisdom.

"You work three jobs? … Uniquely American, isn't it? I mean, that is fantastic that you're doing that." —George W. Bush, to a divorced mother of three, Omaha, Nebraska, Feb. 4, 2005

"After all, Europe is America's closest ally." —George W. Bush, Mainz, Germany, Feb. 23, 2005.

"I was a prisoner too, but for bad reasons." —George W. Bush, to Argentine President Nestor Kirchner, on being told that all but one of the Argentine delegates to a summit meeting were imprisoned during the military dictatorship, Monterrey, Mexico, Jan. 13, 2004

"I'm also mindful that man should never try to put words in God's mouth. I mean, we should never ascribe natural disasters or anything else to God. We are in no way, shape, or form should a human being, play God." —George W. Bush, ABC's 20/20, Washington D.C., Jan. 14, 2005

"I want to appreciate those of you who wear our nation's uniform for your sacrifice." —George W. Bush, Jacksonville, Fla., Jan. 14, 2005

"I have a record in office, as well. And all Americans have seen that record. September the 4th, 2001, I stood in the ruins of the Twin Towers. It's a day I will never forget." —George W. Bush, Marlton, New Jersey, Oct. 18, 2004

"The truth of that matter is, if you listen carefully, Saddam would still be in power if he were the president of the United States, and the world would be a lot better off." —George W. Bush, second presidential debate, St. Louis, Mo., Oct. 8, 2004

"I hope you leave here and walk out and say, 'What did he say?'" —George W. Bush, Beaverton, Oregon, Aug. 13, 2004

Finally, he figured out that none of us in our right fucking mind can understand a blasted thing he says.

1 comment:

BM, The Necessary Movement said...

heyy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!